Pursuing happiness 24/7.

If you want happiness for an hour -- take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day -- go fishing.
If you want happiness for a month -- get married.
If you want happiness for a year -- inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime -- help someone else.

Chinese Proverb

What or whom makes you happy? Most of the time the answer comes easily, even if it might be by saying what makes you “unhappy” rather than naming the happiness in your life.

Do you feel a pang of guilt though whenever you are unhappy, a little blue, down in the dumps or just downright depressed?
What is this guilt based on? Could it be that we feel entitled to happiness?
I suspect many of us think of happiness not as a possible outcome but more as an expectation. We demand being happy 24/7 and no other state of being will do.

However, taking a closer look at Nature it becomes clear that these opposites are natural and necessary. It would be ridiculous to question night and day, the rise and fall of the seas or the waxing and waning of the Moon. So why be so harsh on ourselves for daring to feel less than total bliss at times?

Personally, I’m taking a cue from my natural surroundings by perceiving these opposite states as an essential part of me. I need the less than ideal moments to appreciate and value the happy ones more. Of course I’m not talking about a 50/50 balance here – more like tipping the scale to at least 70/30 in favour of happiness.

So here’s to “adjusted” balance by being true to our emotional selves.
Be inspired.

Playing kitchen witch

“Double, double toil and trouble, fire burn and caldron bubble.” - From Macbeth

The impetus for grabbing a knife and chopping away at roots and herbs while brewing tinctures was a persistent cold that seemed to stay with me week in and week out. Terrified that I won’t ever get rid of my runny nose (imagine the impact on my love life) I took a tiny step away from Western medicine.

What started out as an experiment with grated ginger root went on to me scouring dusty Chinese herbal shops armed with recipes scribbled in Cantonese on scraps of paper searching for ingredients for my “latest” panacea. At the best of times these herbal shops can be “little shops of horrors” but I’ve programmed myself to look past the gory stuff for the time being.

Back in my kitchen I carefully unpack my booty, washing, peeling and grating it into a suitable pot.
What bliss to see it all boiling away on the stove, straining the remaining liquid and then gulping it down with gusto. True pleasure.

What can I say, a few days later and I’m feeling on top of the world again.
What’s more is that my Chinese friendships have blossomed into something else all together. Instead of chatting about work we now ooh-and-aah over plants, roots, herbs, bark, leaves and the best way of preparing these treasures from Nature. I look with different eyes at traditional Chinese medicine – and the more I see, the more I want to explore. With a history of more than two thousand years there sure is plenty to learn.

Two of the easiest recipes I’ve learned the past few days are for boosting the immunity.

Goji berry tea (Wolfberries) – take a few berries, place in a mug, top up with boiling water. Now drink to better eyesight, improved circulation, an enhanced metabolism (yes, yes, yes) and many more benefits.
How easy was that?

Bei Qi (Astragalus) – take four to five pieces of the root and boil in a pot with about 750ml water. Simmer on a low heat for an hour, strain and drink. My friend Doris told me that people in Hong Kong like to drink Bei Qi soup (where they add chicken to the root) once a week during Winter because of it’s immune boosting properties.

(Please note that these recipes are not meant to substitute any prescription treatment or drugs.)

Be inspired…and healthy of course.

Simple pleasures

Being one of those boring workaholic types I need to remind myself every now and then that there is SO much more to life than work. At times it gets so bad that I’ve made a pact to return as a circus performer in my next life; and if that doesn’t cure me I’m opting to see the light as a Magnum sized Moet et Chandon. It’s sad that we tend to think of ourselves mostly in terms of what we achieve and not what we experience. Guess we are programmed to be like this.

So I’ve decided to honour the simple pleasures in my life by listing some of them. Here goes:
- Taking pleasure in the waxing and waning of the Moon.
- Unexpected discoveries like the Buddhist temple in Nam Tei I came across by alighting at the wrong station.
- Watering the garden while watching gigantic cargo ships glide past on the horizon.
- Rediscovering music that I used to listen to all the time. Suddenly “the Doors” and “the Cure” sound brand spanking new. I might even appreciate them more this time round.
- Reconnecting with old pals - bless Facebook and the Web.
- Sharing a meal with friends.
- My flirtatious and loving cats (especially when I have a treat hidden in my pocket).

Personally speaking, being in the moment is crucial to remain grounded and in touch with myself. Instead of fixating on the future or nitpicking past events I’ve noticed that these tiny pleasures keep me in the NOW.
And that’s where I want to be.

Grateful to be inspired (and in the moment).

A great (and easy) way you can make a difference.

We’ve all heard the debates on the correlation between poverty, crime and socio-economic decline. Especially in the developing world it is a vicious cycle that very few people manage to escape from. In 2006 Microfinance came in the spotlight when the Nobel Peace prize was awarded to Prof. Muhammad Yunus and his Grameen Bank. They were awarded the prestigious prize for their Microfinance efforts in Bangladesh resulting in economic and social development from below.

Great idea but how can you get involved? You can pack your bags of course, wave goodbye to your friends and go volunteer where you think you are needed. Let’s be realistic though, that just isn’t possible (or wise) for the majority of us. So, if you have 30 minutes at your disposal you can do one of two things.

Option 1: Donate directly to the Grameen Foundation. They are the experts and know where your money is going to make a difference. The minimum amount to donate is USD 100.

Option 2: KIVA loan.
Step 1 – Choose the business you want to loan to. Here you have the option to look at entrepreneurs seeking loans from a regional or even business sector perspective.
Step 2 – You’ve chosen the person you are lending money to and now you decide how much you want to put into the kitty. The minimum amount is USD 25 and this you pay via Paypal.
Step 3 – You receive regular feedback from the business you sponsor.
Step 4 – When your Kiva loan is repaid it is up to you whether you want to withdraw your funds or re-loan again.

See, I said it’s going to be easy…
I appreciate the Web even more in situations like these. Here is a person on the other side of the world, with a burning desire to improve his/her position in life. Even though you’ve never met this person we all have one thing in common – we want a brighter future for our children, our families.
Today, via the Web you can lend a helping hand.

Inspiring podcasts.

A good friend of mine recently tried out Kelly Howell's CD "The Secret Universal Mind Meditation". Nearly a week later, Heloise was still whooping for joy - a crystal clear indication that she was onto something good. I took a look at Kelly's website and noticed that she has a regular podcast where she interviews spiritual and scientific trendsetters on a variety of topics.
(Oh boy! Just made me realise once again how much I appreciate technology, but I'm digressing.)

Point is; I downloaded some of the interviews on my ipod and Kelly's interview with Richard Moss on his book The Mandala of Being made for a memorable bus trip into town. Richard also offers an online course on the Mandala - you'll find more details on his site.

Highly recommended. Do check it out.
Did I mention that Kelly Howell's podcasts are free to download. (in this day and age?)
Be inspired.

Dream state writing.

A man and a woman stood facing one another. From a distance one could sense the dismay and disappointment evident from their bearing had to do with tainted love. Standing far removed where one would normally be as an observer, you could see tears rolling down their cheeks and plopping unceremoniously onto the parched earth. Some said their discussion looked heated, while others felt their words were born from passion rather than violence or aggression.

It was only when the woman held out her hand to the man that the ripples of emotion reached the bystanders - as if a stone was thrown into a calm lake, the ripples circling out until the energy faded into itself. In the woman’s hand was a smooth, brown pebble.

As the breeze picked up it was seeded with the woman’s words, carrying them like winged hopes to the bystanders.

And this is what she said:

“Lover of mine, throughout the years I have come to know the ripples in your mind, the ripples of pleasure through your body as we made love as well as the ripples you’ve caused in my soul and I in yours. I have loved and hated and loved you again. I have resurrected you only to murder you once more so that I could breathe life into your lifeless body yet again.

In fact, we have done this in turn to one another often enough. I stand in front of you today to say that I want no more of this sweet madness. No more of this intoxicating and alluring cycle.

In my hand I have your heart. So delicate in nature but it’s softness didn’t stop me from trampling all over it. When it was your turn to do with my heart as you wish – you tore its flesh apart. Bit by bit.

Yesterday, I lashed out against the world because of the pain I allowed you to cause me.
Today, however, I rejoice.

Take this pebble I have tenderized with my tears, my essence and my naivety.
Take back your heart and be gentle with it until you are ready to give it up for love again.
I’m grateful for our time together but I’m done.
We’ve paid our karmic debt to one another.”

With those words the woman pressed the pebble into the man’s outstretched hand,
just in time before she was lifted by the gentle breeze.
Some bystanders say the woman disappeared into thin air while others swear they saw a tiny butterfly being carried away into the distance, dancing on the wind.
They do agree on one thing though - that the man was left smiling as he gently held the pebble against his chest.
Needless to say, they were wondering why on earth was he so happy to have received a lifeless rock? If only they knew…

Foliage inspired.

I break out in a cold sweat at the mention of gardening tools and potting soil while the thought of helpless seedlings sends me running. Luckily, my friends caught onto this, hence I’m not the one they speed dial to take care of their plants or gardens before they go on vacation. (I’m told I'm on speed dial for coffee, drinks and entertainment if you wondered). In fact, I suspect the closest I have ever been to having “green fingers” was after a finger painting session.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy the pleasures and tranquility that gardens offer though.
Roughly 3 weeks ago I was privileged to spend time at the Willka Tika garden guesthouse in Peru’s sacred valley. Inspiration hit me as I was meditating in the 3rd chakra/solar plexus garden. This chakra is all about your sense of personal power in this world and is symbolised by the Sun.

An ode to the Sun

I firmly plant my feet on Pachamama and reach up to your golden rays.
Here I stand - focused, strong and certain of every word I say.
Forgotten are the thoughts of being unworthy, weak or hopeless.
My inner flame burning bright even through ink-black nights.
See my light and feel my fire.
To happiness and openness do I aspire.

Direct access to the Universe!

Most like-minded gals I know go gaga over the Secret.
Since seeing the original documentary I’ve been looking into the teachers and what they are all about. Was my interest stirred or what?

Two sites that stand out head and shoulders are the Abraham-Hicks site and Mike Dooley’s Notes from the Universe. The Abraham-Hicks site is very encouraging and as for Mike Dooley’s site. Wow!
I enjoy the site for its playfulness and humour.
Both sites offer an inspirational “thought a day”. What a fabulous way to start one’s day.

On my friend Nicole’s recommendation I signed up for Dooley’s “Notes from the Universe”. (thanks Nic)
My first personalised note reads as follows:

“Should you ever hear that voice inside exclaim that you're working too slow, are too easily distracted, or that you should take life more seriously, please rest assured, dearest juria, that it absolutely, positively is not me.
I'm the one saying, "You totally rock!"
-
 The Universe”

Now if that doesn’t put a smile on your face I don’t know what will…
I am still smiling.

Little Miss Sunshine.

As my alarm went off this morning I turned my gaze to the window and lo and behold… sunshine! A glorious light transformed the murky sea into an image straight from a Club Med brochure. As you can gather the weather has been overcast in Hong Kong the past few days. I adore the sun – not in a “hand me a bikini and surfboard” way. Nope. Can’t do the tanning thing (nor surf). Personally I see the sun more as an energy source. It enlivens and inspires me to do and see more. A sunny day super charges me for days to come.

Of course I’m not saying that you won’t find me working on overcast days. On those days I make do with alternative sources of energy. In no order of preference these include chocolate bars, flutes of Champagne and the rather lengthy workouts that follow these sessions.

This entry is dedicated to all kinds of “light” sources. Sunlight, friendship, books, music, secrets, scent, loving touch etc.

On friendship.
Albert Schweitzer puts it so eloquently:
“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.”

On timing.
In the right light, at the right time, everything is extraordinary. ~Aaron Rose What

On Champagne.
Come quickly, I am tasting the stars!
~ Dom Perignon, at the moment he discovered champagne

…and one for the book club girls.
Champagne and orange juice is a great drink. The orange improves the champagne. The champagne definitely improves the orange. ~ Philip, Duke of Edinburgh

On beauty.
Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.
~Kahlil Gibran

On Nature’s Prozac.
Of God and energy itself. When my heart is heavy, the sun helps make it light. ~Astrid Alauda

On waking up in strange beds/floors (with a blinding headache).
What is true by lamplight is not always true by sunlight. ~Joseph

On those darn assumptions we love to make.
Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in awhile, or the light won't come in. ~Alan Alda

On music.
Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without. ~Confucius

Opera is where a guy gets stabbed in the back, and instead of dying, he sings. ~Robert Benchley

He who sings scares away his woes. ~Cervantes

On books…
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. ~Mark Twain

…and image…
Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. ~P.J. O'Rourke

…and the bizarre.
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. ~Groucho Marx

I leave you with more wise words from Albert Schweitzer:
“Your life is something opaque, not transparent, as long as you look at it in an ordinary human way. But if you hold it up against the light of God's goodness, it shines and turns transparent, radiant and bright. And then you ask yourself in amazement:
Is this really my own life I see before me?”

Be inspired to shine that light of yours.

Hairdryer symphony/cacophony.

It’s examination evening at the Toni & Guy Academy in Wanchai. As hairdressers and stylists elbow one another out of the way to the beat of pumping music and wind tunnel strength hairdryers, the Models slouch around eyeing each other or looking fabulously bored while their hair is being teased to giddy heights. I’m stuck under an ultramodern dryer/heat-emitting machine that looks like 8 tiny solar panels held together with nuts and bolts and a fragrance stick. The contraption radiates heat very constantly and unbelievably effective. I can feel my ears getting hotter by the minute. Note to self: consider carrying icepack along with mosquito repellant and hand sanitizer. This is what you get when and ordinary gal like me moonlights as a model...

I’m modeling for Chi and met him two weeks ago in this very same studio where I’m busy melting. Every three months I treat myself to a fun haircut at the Toni & Guy Academy. Their trainees are young and funky and really go out of their way to make my hair look modern. It’s also ridiculously cheap and I just love the idea of throwing caution to the wind when I sign the indemnity form before a haircut or colour job.

Having said that, my track record at the Academy looks great compared to the horrendous haircuts I’ve had in Hong Kong previously where “just a trim” ends up in me bawling my eyes out while reaching for hats and scarves to cover my manhandled head in the height of Summer.

Back to Chi. As I said, he was my designated hairdresser two weeks ago and his eyes lit up when I said he can do with my hair what he pleases as long I’ve got some length at the back and a couple of locks to cover my ears. There and then he asked me to be a model for his examination and of course I couldn’t resist. I must mention that I was exceptionally open to new ideas at that stage too as he was giving me the best head and neck massage I’ve had in eons. Chi enthusiastically cut my hair for the next hour and while he was working away on my locks I was comforted by his creative buzz. It was clear that he was enjoying his task. As I sat watching him I realized that I couldn’t think of any better way of being in the moment other than enjoying what you are doing.

Later, when I asked Chi what I should bring along on the big night he said was: “Make-up please”. Seeing that I have two left hands with limp wrists when it comes to handling make-up I made a pit stop at the MAC counter on the way over to the Academy with explicit instructions to the gorgeous girl at the counter to make me look fabulous. PLEASE.

After a long wait and the models checking out the competition we went on stage with a very nervous Chi. I had an elegant lady from the Philippines next to me and her biggest concern was not to look “shiny” on stage. Mine was not to trip over my own feet. After Chi turned us around to show off the various angles and this and that of the cut, we were in turn prodded by the owners and trainers of the salon. Each of them whipped out a comb and started combing out sections of our hair to look at…gosh, I don’t really know what. They did make appreciative sounds though so I guess they were happy with what they found at the ends of their combs.

I took the 962 bus home feeling on top of the world, it was only when I got home and looked in the mirror that I saw my two crimson ears poking through my locks. Hopefully the cute guy sitting next to me on the bus didn’t notice.

Seriously though, for the next couple of days staying in the moment is going to be a breeze for me. I’m planning to focus on things that bring me joy and pleasure. Even when I’m in a situation that I don’t necessarily enjoy I’ll aim for finding the joy in the specific moment. Three cheers from this self-proclaimed and loving it hedonist to joy, pleasure and inspiration.

The things we do when outrageously stretched.

My inspirational person for this entry is Nicole Graham (gorgeous girl in striped top). She’s a real dynamo and has the gift to stretch people and their ideas. Here follows one case in point where she inspired me to partake in something I’d never dream of.

I’m not into reality TV at all. (Repeat).
However, last year saw me entering Amazing Race Asia under Nic’s subtle guiding hand. Reality TV bosses aim to make things an uphill battle from the start and part of the 4-page entry form - resembling a genealogy questionnaire - we had to contrive a three-minute video clip. Paperwork out of the way we recklessly launched into the “making” of the clip. I’m very self-conscious when it comes to cameras; just pointing the thing in my direction turns my ears a bright shade of scarlet. Not a good start! I'm sure you'll understand this left me no choice but to have a glass of champagne to transform my cheeks from ashen white to a reddish hue thus allowing my ears and cheeks to blend at least. (Of course no one told me a rosy glow converts the moment you are on-camera; turning a gentle glow into an angry hue suggesting you’ve been slapped rather violently across the face).

Being firm believers in artistic freedom and all things impromptu we got our cameraman (Adele) to start rolling from the word go. As we boisterously burst through the door and onto the loose rug, said rug moved out from underneath us and we fell. Quite hard, actually. How were we to know that one glass of hastily drunk Champagne would have such a major impact on our sure-footedness? Dazed and giggly we tried to get back on our feet. Our relentless cameraman was filming our fleshy bitts and exposed underwear while she was also bent-over in hysterics herself. She's got steady hands.

Well, that took care of half of our required clip length and the rest we simply filled up by shovelling peanuts into our mouths (mostly onto the floor) with chop sticks and kicking a feathered contraption around to show off our grace and agility. Needless to say the producers never called us, they started filming the series without us. It did make for a fun and fearless afternoon though. (Incidentally, the Amazing Race Asia was won by two women - great!)

Not only is Nicole up for fun, she makes a positive effort to empower women through her Modern Goddess playshops and other inspirational events too. She just launched her Modern Goddess e-magazine and her website is crammed with interesting and inspirational tidbits.

My personal take on the Modern Goddess is that it’s all about girl power in a non-feminist way. In other words, you don’t need to burn your Victoria’s Secret bra to be a Modern Goddess. I like that.

I asked Nicole what inspires her and this is what she said:
“ There are many things that inspire me and I guess it depends on what I’m doing at the time as to how they inspire me. I’m mostly inspired by people who want to make this world a better place. Whether that is supporting women, rescuing animals or helping children, the poor or sick. This inspires me to be a better person and to do what I can, when I can to help make this world a better place.

I am also inspired by beautiful things; this could be a well-made suit, a gorgeous sculpture, an unusual archway or a freshly opened flower. This sort of inspiration helps me be creative: creative in my writing and my photography.”

Viva the Modern Goddess. Have a look at Nicole’s suggestions for protecting your Psychic self.

Be inspired.

The concept of Kindness.

It's a hazy day in Hong Kong and as I was surfing the web for a bit of inspiration I came across this great foundation with a long but meaningfull name: the random acts of kindness foundation.

The idea of kindness or lack thereof resonates strongly to me; especially today. I've lost someone very near and dear to me and can't help but think that maybe the outcome would've been different or at least more amicable, was I a little kinder towards him.
Anyway, here are 10 ideas for kindness that I got from the above mentioned site:

1. Say hello
2. Visit a friend
3. Let another go first
4. Forgive mistakes
5. Share a smile
6. Say hello
7. Lend a hand
8. Be tolerant
9. Offer a hug
10. Do an act of kindness every day

To that I would add:
Don't try to convert people to feel the same as you do about life; choose your battles carefully; turn a blind eye sometimes; stop gushing about yourself and your achievements and listen to what others are saying for a change AND be positive, even if it means you need to "fake" it (the real deal will follow soon enough).

I'm off to go smile and say hello to people - over a coffee of course.

Kung Hei Fat Choy!

Juggler extraordinaire.

I mentioned in a previous post that I would chat to Sophie Paine about what she finds inspiring. Last year saw her publishing her first book “Are you my mummy? / Es-tu mon papa?”

Besides writing children’s books she also offers Financial literacy training to kids and adults.
(I might need to knock on her door for a little help in the effective budgeting department).

We had a chat over yummy Indian food at Chunking mansion and since then, truth be told, I ended up staring at a blank computer screen every time I sat down to write about Sophie. Here’s my predicament. She’s a finance whiz but at the same time she is fully in touch with her creative side. Pardon me for thinking that chartered accountants all wear pale gray suits and secretly communicate via their calculators. Where do I place her in this world we so skillfully filled with boxes, labels and tags for people?

Lesson learnt. As a result I will tweak my approach and instead of structuring Sophie’s inspiration (through my eyes) on a page; I’m just going to let rip. Bugger structure, bugger labels and everything else that goes with that.

Sophie was born in Orleans, France and she’s married to Denzel: whom she describes as an incredibly loving and supportive guy.
They have two lovely boys - Sebastian and Oliver, aged 9 and 7 respectively, who like to swim and play ping-pong.
They love traveling as a family and find multicultural surroundings interesting and inspirational.
She’s learning not one, but two new languages – Mandarin and Arabic. Wow, wow and wow.

What inspires me about Sophie is her seemingly effortless jumping from one project to the next. Now that must call for some serious time management skills. When I asked her about this she described it as “cross fertilization between different projects”. The one nurtures the other. I do like the sound of that. Maybe after I get “Effective Budgeting 101” down to a tee I can start connecting my tiny projects with one another.

Well, I’m inspired. I’m sure you are too.

In this day and age of e-mail I’ve come to adore anything handwritten. Check out Sophie’s note on how she likes to relax at home. Whew, just when I though this Superwoman doesn’t need to take a break.

Escape to (a nearby) Paradise.

Just before Christmas we escaped to a Golf Resort in Hui Zhou city, Guang Dong province. Now, this is not too far from Hong Kong – less than two hours traveling. The drive there though, has the potential to excite and devastate you all at once. In Hong Kong, we are used to drivers adhering to road signs and rules. However, the moment you cross the border into China you are in for quite a ride. Not bumpy at all! Just a lot of reckless driving at neck break speed all the way to your destination.

But wait, I’m digressing. The resort and especially our rooms were gorgeous and judging by the way the guys were raving about the different golf courses; I’d say those were great too.
Mid-lunch, Adele and I had our first taste of what it felt like to be golf widows. Our initial impulse of course was to order a bottle of wine (each) but instead we opted for Le Spa.
Thank heavens we did…

Within a matter of minutes we were sipping tea daintily from tiny cups while jostling for the “menu” (as we kept on referring to the list of services). After we held a lengthy caucus we decided on a 3-hour package that looked like absolute bliss.

Our pampering session included a foot scrub, aromatherapy body scrub and a Swedish massage. Oh yes, we opted for a bikini wax too – just to keep it real you know. At this point, I have to say that we were struggling earlier at the restaurant to communicate with the waiters. At the spa though it was a completely different case. The girls (especially the manager Apple Lam) were incredibly helpful and made recommendations for treatments – at times in broken English but understandable nonetheless. Something else that struck me was that my Chinese therapist had a very gentle and kind touch. Not at all like the massages I’ve had in Hong Kong before – even though it was the same “style” of massage. I’d compare her touch more with what I’ve experienced in Thailand. Very gentle. Very unhurried.

I emerged from my private room three hours later. Hair sticking out in all directions and a sheepish grin on my face. Wow!
Adele was still busy. I heard little yelps coming from her room – my guess was that she was being waxed. First timer - ouch.

While I ignored Adele’s cries for mercy by slurping my tea, I was handed a feedback form by the owner, Alison Chan. We started chatting and talked spa, business and Yoga.
She’s a great girl with even greater ideas. She reminded me a lot of a friend, Nicole. Interesting enough, Nicole is also involved with the esoteric and spiritual side of life.

Anyway, to make a long story short – our newly acquired golf widow status had a stunning upswing at the end. In the future, this could prove to be a nice weekend away for the girls too.

To bring you into the picture: the golf widows are starting golf lessons next week. Either way we are making sure that we are not missing out on any action in the future – whether it’s on the golf course or in the spa afterwards doesn’t really matter.

Here's to inspiring golf swings and perfect putting.